Do not let the child grow

Do you remember the wide eyed kid that you were many years back? Those absolutely carefree times when you discovered a new thing or two at every nook or corner. Remember the first time you saw heavy rains and wondered from where so much water coming from. Or the first time you saw water logging in streets and longed to jump in that filthy water Or the first time you saw a rainbow and kept gazing at it. The first time you saw a skyfull of stars and kept bothering your dad or mom to explain those twinkling sources of light. The first time you saw a butterfly and were so excited to see so many colors together. The first time you discovered a touch-me-not plant in your backyard and were amused beyond words. Your days were laced with so many “firsts” and yet the “firsts” never seemed to tire you. Your infectious enthusiasm and energy never fell short of questions to ask from the elders.
Fast forward to the present day you – a hot shot professional in a multinational company earning more money that your dad could dream of. Yes, you did your parents proud.
Yet when was the last time you felt a first and felt it with same fervor as when you saw your first rainbow. In this world of unending available means of titillating our sensations, are you losing out your capability of feeling?
What does any parent want of her new born child? What are the qualities she wants her to possess when she grows up ? Self-confident, smart, creative ,loving and above all happy. The purpose of any education in any part of the world is to make a good human being out of any child.
You go back to your two-year-old self and take a close look at her. Was she self-confident? Was she smart? Was she creative? Was she loving? Above all was she happy? Goodness gracious! The answers are all yes! Then what have you grown up into? Growth is expansion and progress, are we missing something here?
Somewhere during the busy-ness of growing up, someone robbed us of all those qualities which we already had in abundance. It is as if, all these qualities are to be rationed, and not freely available to one and all. Today, we look self-confident , but live with a million insecurities. In our eagerness to do things correctly always, we have forgotten to be spontaneous. As a child, there was nothing that could scare us. Today we are hailed as smart and bright, but look at what we do. We waste our health in pursuit of wealth and then blow up all the wealth to get back the lost health. Our two-year-old selves would definitely call us idiots. Today sadly, we have to go to “creative training” sessions to restore our lost creativity. There was a time when we could draw on walls with remarkable aplomb – anything from houses, men, women, sun, river, fish. Today, we let a dying street dweller die and move on. There was a time when a dying street mongrel would make us cry our hearts out. Today, we do not feel sleepy till well past midnight, we might actually take recourse to many aids in order to calm down our mind and make it sleep-ready. Yet there was a time when we would have difficulty keeping our eyes open when the small hand of the clock was at seven and the big hand at twelve.
Oh, where has she gone? Has she left us forever to battle with the demons within us alone? No, she was never selfish, she is still within us. Given a chance, she does make her presence felt. Like the times, when you shed a tear or two after seeing Nagesh Kukkonoor’s “Iqbal”. Or the time when you braved conventional wisdom to help out your needy and sick neibhour by collecting money and arranging for blood through emails. Or the time when you hopped on to the dance floor knowing very well that you are an awful dancer. Or the last time you picked your rusting guitar , changed the strings and spent hours on end to play your favourite songs. Or you borrowed your time out from your monotonous routine and solved that cracking algorithm on the internet. Or those days, when you felt on top of the world for particularly no reasons, that unconditional feeling of happiness that seemed to spring forth from within and not triggered by external events. These were the precious moments when your two your old self became one with your current self. These were the sparks that helped you to stand up for yourself and the world.
Let us give that child more chances and more space. Let us take care of the child that resides in us so that she can take care of us in times of our needs. Let us not allow her to grow. In that child lies our happiness, and who would not agree that the only true sign of success is an unconditional smile on our faces.
Saluting the child in me,
Sujala

Comments

Rumela Sengupta said…
I think our angst is not about missing childhood or the days gone by, but having forgotten what it was to be AWARE, to breathe in the experiences of life with each pore of our being. I would not like to go back in time, I enjoy the current challenges and situations in my life. But I also need to remind myself once in a while to "lose control" and let myself adrift in the river of life or just sit down on the banks and let the waves wash over my senses. I sometimes feel like a bucket full of muddy water which if left alone for sometime will yield the crystal clear water of ideas on the surface after the mud has settled down. Those are the times that I know the child within me is still alive ...
Abu A Hussain said…
'Eulogy', the word that comes to the mind when one goes through this piece. Eulogy it is, of the child within us, of the innocence. There was a time when we were ignorant of the physics, the chemistry or the logic of the happenings around us. Yes we were ignorant, but we were happy because we were not concerned with them all, we were concerned with their beauty. So many firsts, each beautiful in its own way. The firsts are still there. But do we really enjoy them as much as we did our firsts then? It makes me think and think really hard. And even though my brain tends to disagree, deep down I seem to know the answer and the answer is "no, I don't".
Yet at times, sometimes, now and then, the child resurfaces. The innocent, ignorant one. The one who doesn't care about reason, cause and outcome. The one who wants to enjoy, to love, to be loved. And at those times, don't think, don't apply reason, don't worry about the outcome. Just give in to the child. Ask him to lead and follow him. It works on me, it keeps me alive, and I believe it would work on you too.
Now that I can reason, I think one cannot overlook the responsibilities of a so called grown up, so beautifully stated by Robert Frost in his poem 'Stopping by the woods on a snowy evening' where he says 'The woods are lovely, dark and deep.....But I have promises to keep.....And miles to go before I sleep'. Yes, I admit that I have miles to go. But every now and then, there would always be some 'woods' lying somewhere along the way. Those are the times when He comes to the fore and takes charge. Looking forward to seeing you again buddy....soon.
PANKAJ KUMAR said…
hi sujala, trust me i never knew u were so sentitive....ur blog is too good, sweet, sentitive and sad but realistic....there are times when we wish to be like before but there are some constrains. its like, when we look upon our past sometimes we find ourselves more grownup like what we are now.
there is a real story..SOME AUDITIONS WAS GOING ON FOR THE FAMOUS DENICE THE MENACE KID. THEY WERE LOOKING FOE IDEAL DENICE. NOW THIS BOY TURNED UP AND HAD A CHAT AND THEN HE SAID, "U KNOW I HAVE A PET, I FOUND IT ON ROAD", DIRECTOR ASKED, "WHAT IS THAT", THE KID SAID, "I NAMED IT WORMIE AND HE TOOK AN EARTHWORM OUT OF HIS POCKET" LOLZZ AND HE GOT SELECTED.... everyone has a child within him throughout his life but by the time we grow up its activity reduces and thats when we call ourselves grown up in this selfish world....its kind of loosing a good part of ourselves....its kind of sad!!!
KEEP IT UP DEAR......NICE FACT!! NOT A STORY
Konjon said…
A few days back one of my friends left me a message asking me why is that most of our conversations with our friend now a days starts and ends with the pharse "Aur Bato ?" I guess it is because that is the most safest question to be asked, like I am not intruding on your space and you are not intruding on mine.
When we were young we did not have any baggage of "reputations ", "image" to maintain. As a kid sounding foolish didnot have any big significance with us. but as we grew old the whip of intrusion , foolishness and image have sort of held us back ..it has reserved us. So even if you have anything on the tip of your toungue or even if you are overjoyed with any experience ..that voice comes in and says "temper it down my dear , donot sound over eager" . If we can let that go ..then may be we can still feel the way we did when we were young.. the reasons and feelings will not be editied..But then again the world doesnot expect that !! and expectations are SUCH a BIG thing that the same editing of feelings continue.
- Mamuni
Arundhati said…
Sujala always knew you were very eloquent....the blog is touching...but...I don't think I would like to retrace my steps...having too much fun right NOW......as a child I existed more in my dreams than in the world....now the world is like a dream ( good or bad :-))....so any incident good or bad...is not overwhelming but momentous.... at least I am more responsible now than I was as a child....and yet have those moments when nature leaves me awestruck....by its beauty or omnipotence....life can only get better.....:)

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